Recently I saw a bride asking the question, “How young is too young to get married?” The answer can be a controversial issue. As someone who got married at 22 and has kids who got married at 19 and 20, I thought it was important to weigh in on the subject.
Wondering How Young Is Too Young to Get Married?
You are young and in love, so what’s stopping you from tying the knot? Somewhere in the mix of wedding gowns and bachelor parties, it can be easy to forget all the less glamorous parts of a wedding. Of course, I’m talking about paying for the big day or the stress of planning a wedding ceremony and reception.
Younger brides get a lot of flack for getting married at a young age when the reality is that many decisions go into a lifetime together. This begs a question that needs to be answered.
So, how young is too young to get married?
Reasons Early Marriages Fail
Those in their late teens and early 20s are still discovering themselves and learning who they are as people. Lack of life experience and emotional immaturity are two common reasons why early marriages can fail. Notice that it doesn’t say it will fail.
While younger couples might have chemistry with one another, they often lack the history that sustains a lifelong relationship.
However, older couples tend to have positive memories and fights to carry them through difficult times. Many young couples are still having fun together and might not have those experiences already under their belt.
However, that doesn’t mean a couple can’t learn and grow up together as they gain life experiences. Although finances and potentially having children young may be a burden, if you’re committed, you can stick through anything. Learning together can be a fun experience that will bond you for the long haul.
Signs You Could Be Getting Married for the Wrong Reasons
When you walk down the aisle matters a lot less than why you want to walk down it at all. If you find yourself relating too much to any of these, it could be a sign that it’s less about how long you’ve been together and more about deeper issues rooted in your relationship.
You believe life begins after marriage.
Every fairytale and Hallmark movie ends with a wedding where a couple is “finally together.” These movies wouldn’t get such good ratings if they started on the wedding day. The reality is that real love doesn’t look like a Hallmark movie.
It is full of dirty laundry, financial hardship, and crazy in-laws, all under one roof for the first time. The reality of day-to-day can be a shock to some.
“The answer to how young is too young to get married is unique to each couple.”
You are just tying the knot.
While marriage is full of adventures and fun, it’s not just “tying the knot.” Many people approach their marriage as a dating relationship part two.
For some couples, marriage isn’t the next step, and some never get married. Marriage comes with its own hardships and can drastically change a relationship. However, if you’re getting married to the right person for the correct reasons, you can set yourself up for a lifetime of success.
How Young Is Too Young to Get Married?
If you were to ask couples how long they dated before getting married or how long they should wait, many people would say anywhere from a few years to a decade or longer. If you feel ready to take the next step after four years of dating your high school sweetheart, haven’t you already made the time?
Regarding how young is too young, this answer should be unique to each couple. What is too young for one might be perfect for another.
Instead of looking at a couple and asking if they’re too young, we should reframe the question to ask, “are you ready for marriage?” Maybe the happy couple has thought about factors such as the blessings of the families, how they’ll afford marriage, and if they are ready to take that next step.
Why should we be the ones holding them back from a supportive and lifelong marriage? There is no general age or answer that is a one-size-fits-all solution. With careful consideration and guidance, you and your partner can decide what’s best — especially when you consider the opinions of those who love you best.
Save our thoughts on how old you need to be to get engaged!
What are your thoughts? Do you agree or disagree? Feel free to comment and showcase a different point of view.